Before I wrote to you on Seedurdays, back when I was first starting this newsletter, I wrote to you on #Caturdays. Over the years, I shared lots of garden pictures of this guy, perhaps the world's best garden model:

Though it has to be mentioned, even as a youngster he was never much for catching gophers. This picture was pretty typical, giving me a look that says, "Well? Aren't you going to get those gophers?"

As of today, our beloved Nani, who turned 16 in November and whose full name is Hernan de San Jose, has been missing for about 3 weeks after a tussle with a coyote. He escaped, but he hasn't been home since, and we are resigning ourselves to the worst.

Last week I choked up as I used his lovely animated gif to highlight our Cat Grass kit during the sale.

He's so robust and healthy in that clip. He was big and strong, very much an outdoor cat who held his own against coyotes for most of his life. Recently, though, he'd been slowing down. I love watching him here in his prime, and also it brings me tears.

Losses are amplified this time of year. Whether or not they happened during this season, they are alive, renewed and refreshed.

The frenetic busy-ness of December may be part of the point. You can't sit still long enough to dwell indefinitely. Of course, the festive stress can get to be a bit much too.

I read this lovely piece this week about taking some time to potter in the garden as an antidote to holiday strain. And, reader, I did. I got up after reading the column and raked leaves for about an hour. I really did feel better.

I also realized that I'd been avoiding the garden because Nani wasn't there.

For the 10 years we've lived in this house, Nani has spent every day in the garden. He wasn't the most sociable indoors, but in the garden, he always came out from wherever he was doing cat things to keep us company. Lounging in a sunbeam or wriggling in the grass, or just sniffing around to see what was going on, he was our garden companion.

I always used to say that our garden wasn't complete without the adornment of a beautiful cat who somehow always put himself in the loveliest spot.

So, in a bizarre circle, the grief for the cat has been keeping me from the garden pottering that is the antidote to the holiday stress, which is itself partly the distraction from the grief.

I'm glad to say I got out there anyway. In addition to raking leaves, I gathered up old nursery pots to return to the garden center and tidied up bits of flotsam that had been blowing around the yard. The result is nice, for sure, but so was the process.

If the weather permits, I hope you find some time to potter this weekend, even if it's only a gentle rambling in the cold.

Happy Seedurday / Caturday,

Anne

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When you’re ready, here are some more ways I can help you grow a thriving garden from seed:

1. Plan your seed-starting schedule with our ​free printable planner.​

2. Download the free ​Orta Seed Starting Handbook with all the basics you need to succeed with seeds.​

3. Take the guesswork out of watering with Orta Self-Watering Pots. (Find discounted factory seconds here!)

4. Join the Orta Seed Club to have 5 hand-picked, unusual & high-yielding varieties delivered to you every season.

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